PROS & CONS OF A RETIRED LIFE

Let’s see what life is after retirement for us seniors and what can we do to carry on with life in a positive manner if possible.   To begin with let’s have a few quotes about the pros and cons of retirement :

“Age is only a number, a cipher for the records. A man can’t retire his experience. He must use it.” – Bernard Baruch

“Retire from work, but not from life.” – M.K. Soni

Retirement without the love of letters is a living burial.” – Seneca

“Retirement is a great opportunity to become the person you have always wanted to be – but have never been.” – Dave Erhard

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When we are young and decide to start our career, we never ever think that we will stop working till as long as we can.  Yes, at the back of our mind we know that one day we will retire from work since we know that every beginning has to have an end sooner or later.  

As years pass by and we start enjoying our work and of course initially everyone have teething problems and have to get used to the routine and culture of the work in any particular job that we are in. But we do overcome it.  Then of course, we have the colleagues with whom we interact and enjoy every minute with them at work.  We get so used to each other and enjoy each other’s company.  Gradually we start feeling the workplace to be our first home.

But as you know time does not wait it has to move on, before we even realise we have reached the retiring age.  When we attain 60 years and are called by the Boss Man (heart starts pounding knowing fully well what it is going to be), we dread it but nothing is to be done as we know what it is.  But that is the way it is and we have to face it and given the letter of retirement, and followed by an encouraging speech on how to use our time etc. etc. We of course listen to it graciously though hearts of hearts, we are very sad and are trying to hide the tears. Though knowing that it had to happen but it still is painful and but for those who want to retire they of course do feel happy.

How should we treat Retirement

Many workers spend their lives dreaming about the retirement, but the reality does not always meet the fantasy. There are pros and cons to retirement, both in terms of finances and in terms of lifestyle. Understanding the possible negative consequences of calling it a career can help you make a better transition from the role of worker to the role of new retiree.  

Treat retirement as an everyday occurrence. Suppose you retire at the age of 60 years old. Look back over the previous sixty years and ask yourself if you have not already been doing some things that had an element of "retiring" attached to them. Don’t you retire every day, at the end of the day for sleep? Look at in this way, you have sixty years of experience retiring in some way, every day of your life.  And, when you get up each day it is a chance to celebrate a new day, a new outlook on life, and to find renewed energy to make a difference in the world. There is always opportunity for change and redirection. Similarly, your retirement from a job is not an end but a transition; it is a transition from one phase of your life to a new and, with your agreement and effort, a better phase for you, both intellectually and spiritually. As such, it is a definite cause for celebration.

Don't feel like you're 'less' a person because you aren't working. Retirement does not make you a lesser person: You remain a highly skilled and talent-endowed person with skill sets that have grown over the many years and that have provided you with many achievements throughout the tenure of your employment or business life. When you retire, you still have those skill sets. From an employee, your status can suddenly transform to that of being an entrepreneur and you are your own boss and decision maker, not a follower. That's a huge positive!  

Consider the bondage of employment versus the freedom of retirement. While for some people the security of daily employment brought not only regular financial reward but also routine, regularity and patterns, for many employees, it is a cause for complaint, feeling constrained but the tradeoff of security, and familiarity usually wins out.

For those of you for whom there were many things you wanted to do during your employment, but couldn't due to the compulsions of your employment and time constraints, retirement offers a breath of fresh air filled with opportunity. Now you can fulfill those wishes, dreams, and goals without the previous time and rule constraints of your job.

Avoid the trap of telling yourself you're "too old". In a world where the older population is growing increasingly large, greater acceptance of retirees taking on renewed roles in society now exists, and there is great freedom to undertake new business and work as a retiree. Telling yourself that you're too old, too poor, too worn out, etc., tends to be self-fulfilling and will trap you into giving up.

Use and build on the knowledge you have gained while you were working. You have a wide source of knowledge gained from your education and professional experience. Be prepared to pass on this knowledge to those who need it; there are always plenty of inexperienced people seeking to learn more from those who have great skills and knowledge. This will not only give you satisfaction, but you will also stay up-to-date with your skills because you will need to ensure you're passing on the latest knowledge. Do community and charity work.  In doing this, you will become more mentally, spiritually, and psychologically attuned and will feel a greater sense of fulfillment during your retirement.

The responsibility always rests with us to remain up-to-date when we leave educational institutions and workplaces, and with the internet, online libraries, and many free educational resources, there is no excuse for not keeping informed.  Consider working with wikis in the online environment as a way to share skills, teach, and reach out to people in an educational context. This allows you to be mobile (a laptop or iPad can go anywhere you can), and providing a great place to record your knowledge and expertise for future generations to learn from.

Try social networking for company and for reaching out to share information. During your employment, you may never have had the inclination or time to be a part of social networking.  Now you have all the time in the world and good reason to inject your wisdom into the social network streams. Join social networks like Twitter, Facebook, Linkedin, and others. Many influential people from politics, films, sports, media and other fields are actively involved in the social networking and what's more, you do not need to be famous to become influential; rather, you need to make it clear that you know what you're talking about and people will soon listen and follow you.  You can even write articles in blogs in the areas of your expertise.

Think about teachers who never stop teaching, healers who never stop healing, and writers who never stop writing. There is always something to contribute, especially where it concerns teaching the young and the willing.

Keep yourself engaged. Stay active for giving in to passivity and doing nothing will bring despair, helplessness, and futility into your life faster than you can blink. Engage yourself in the above activities or at least some, and rest assured, Keeping yourself engaged will also keep you mentally and physically healthy.

Time is a precious commodity, and one that retirees have in abundance. Without the responsibilities and stresses of a job, retirees are free to visit their children and grandchildren whenever they want. Retirees can also travel as much as their budgets allow, or use their new-found freedom to take up a new hobby or explore new interests.

Many retirees find that they are simply bored after the first few years. After 30 or 40 years of getting up and going to work each day, some retirees simply feel adrift without the structure of a job. Retirees may also miss the personal and social aspects of employment, including day to day interactions with coworkers, shared stories and lunches out. Retirees can combat this boredom by taking on a part-time job, or by doing some consulting or charity work.

What may be the positive and negative effects of retirement on the individual?

That would depend on the individual, of course. Some people might experience depression or a sense of loss if their identity was tied into their work. Being on a fixed income can present a problem. Generally, if they have insurance, they must pick up the entire cost. Health issues may arise with the person or a spouse.

On the other hand, retirement can be absolutely wonderful. You have more freedom, and if your income is adequate, you can do some of the things you might not have been able to do in the past, such as travel.  

I'd say, if you have financial security and your health is good, retirement is great. Otherwise, it would not be good at all.

What to Do When Your Adult Children Don’t Like You to be retired

Since being retired and being home you tend to do more for your children as you may not have been able to attend on them while working.

Often our offspring suddenly appear distant or not eager for our company.  We feel slighted.

Our concerns, however, can be a tempest in a teapot. Parents may be making a big deal over what’s really a normal developmental stage. “Sometimes a kid is just sending the message, ‘I do like you, but I don’t want to be attached like glue, "A parent shouldn’t interpret that as a sign of enmity.”   Perceived indifference is usually just an adult child's act of independence.

After retirement the children when they find you are home most of the time feel that they have lost their space and don’t want to become your confidente they don’t want to hear about such personal things — but not because they’re self-centered. “A parent/child relationship is pretty intense," "and as they get older, the natural tendency is to want to separate and gain some distance.”

We often observe that grown kids may recoil if they perceive their parents as being needy. “What really turns young adults off, is the idea that their parent has a problem and they’re supposed to fix it.”

Create a full life that doesn’t revolve around your children. : A parent who expects his or her adult children to be everything becomes a burden. We need to fill our lives with our own passions and hobbies. When our happiness or well-being doesn’t entirely depend on our children, we can better enjoy them more when we do see them.”

In other words, the more interesting our lives, the more interesting we become — and the more interesting our children will find us.

If there is a kernel of truth, decide whether it’s something we’d like to change. After all, our children really are our greatest teachers.

“You don’t stop laughing when you grow old, you grow old when you stop laughing”. - George Bernard Shaw

Parsan Narang

Kolkata

5th April 2016